Perspective is Everything

I think that it is wise to start this off with a disclaimer: My intention is in no way, shape or form, to turn someone’s mountain into a mole hill. I don’t want to dismiss the hardships, injustices, or challenges that may have besieged an individual. I am not insensitive to the fact that these adverse situations can often have a profound effect on a person's life. Although the ramifications may be difficult to quantify, I will not dispute that the impact cannot be ignored. On the contrary, I empathize with you. I sit quietly to hear the pains of your heart and to offer you the comfort in which I have been comforted with. I recognize that I have not stood in your shoes. Even though I have had my share of adversity, I cannot necessarily say that I know what you are going through or what you have been through.

That being said, in all sincerity…I will, however, boldly say that the quality of our lives are often the byproduct of our decisions, choices and mindsets. So to put it bluntly, the way your life currently looks is, in large part,  your fault or of your own making. I know some may view that as harsh, critical or self-righteous. Rest assured that as I present this notion, I do not exclude my life from the scrutiny that is rendered by this standard of measure.

While it is often easier to blame or justify the unappealing condition of our lives on external circumstances or on other people, it is generally a misguided perspective that tends to protect our own ego and settle us into a state of victimhood. This state is overpopulated and forces out sound wisdom while folly maintains its residence. It is a state, I have realized, that many people are comfortable in. Their mantra is “Woe is me” and their solutions are often predicated upon someone else making adjustments or fixing something while they observe and scrutinize whether the adjustments are acceptable or not. 

Proverbs 15:15 states “All the days of the afflicted are bad, but a cheerful heart has a continual feast”.

Have you ever known someone who is never having a good day? Someone who bought a bed that has two wrong sides so it doesn’t matter which side they roll off of, it’s always going to be the same result. If it is raining, they complain that the sun is not shining. When the sun is shining, they complain that it is too bright. This is a person whose cup is always half empty and when it’s full, it’s only a matter of time before it’s half empty again. I can imagine that this is your most favorite-est person to be around, right? That was sarcasm…

Now, my point is not for you to search the repository of your mind to identify this person so that you can criticize them. I use these examples to illustrate a point that was highlighted in the passage that I referenced.  “All the days of the afflicted are bad” meaning that the ones who identify themselves as “the afflicted” or “the victim” will never have a good day because of their perspective. Since they see themselves as the one who is unjustly treated, marginalized, afflicted and victimized, their approach to life will be marked by that view. Their days will go through the filter of  this perspective, resulting in a life characterized by negativity, failure, disappointment and heartache. 

In contrast, the one with the cheerful heart has a continual feast. Feasting often symbolizes or refers to celebration. Being cheerful in heart is the opposite of embracing the identity of the afflicted. The cheerful in heart sees things through a different lens. Choosing to see the silver lining, so to speak. Extracting the gold out of the mines of adversity and challenges. The “cheerful in heart” is not synonymous with naivete or being in denial. They are not blind nor negate that the challenges exist. They simply choose to address the problem, but not esteem it. What makes them cheerful is not the situation itself, but the confident expectation that good can be yielded even from adversity or calamity.

I know that these concepts can come off as being theoretical without experiential application, so in an attempt to curb the resistance to consider what I’m saying, let me offer up my own experience. After nearly seven years of working at a company that I thought that I was going to retire from, I was unexpectedly terminated. There was no sign of this impending action and I was blindsided as I assumed that the trajectory of my career was still on course. I was the primary source of income for my family so all of the expenses incurred no longer had a means of being remitted. My mind was bombarded with various thoughts and questions. “How did this happen?”, “Was this justified?”, “What are the next steps?”, “This seems unfair”, “I thought that they valued me”. These were a few of my musings among an array of other questions and concerns. 

Although this was not an ideal situation, it did present an opportunity for me to reconsider the course of my life. It was a chance to explore a path that would’ve otherwise been ignored. I sought the counsel of God and received clarity in the way that I should go. From the outside looking in, the path seemed illogical with little margin for error, but I chose faith over fear. I was unemployed from a traditional vocation for nearly a year and it would be a lie to say that this season was easy. It carried its difficulty, however,  I came to an intersection of self-pity and resilience. I was either going to wallow in the “woes are me” or I was going to plant my feet and stand on what I was determined and led to do. 

This is all about a matter of mindsets. Do you see yourself as the victor or the victim? Will the obstacles you encounter be viewed as stepping stones or stumbling blocks? I have heard it said, and I use the phrase often myself, that perspective is everything. This simply means that your view of life regulates how you operate in life and will be a determining factor in its quality. It affects every aspect and facet of your life, so it is imperative that your perspective is healthy. 

Life will not be without its troubles; its hardships that are associated with our individual decisions and actions, accompanied by the collective decisions and actions of others. The goal is not to spend our lives trying to avoid the challenges, but to be in possession of a disposition that is the result of seeing from the right perspective.